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  • Mark Russell
  • and Jay Leno
  • Art Buchwald, Chevy Chase and President Ford
  • Vivre la France
  • and Mort Sahl
  • and Woody Allen
  • Mark Russell
  • and Jay Leno
  • Art Buchwald, Chevy Chase and President Ford
  • Vivre la France
  • and Mort Sahl
  • and Woody Allen

A Few More Notes from Mark Russell

So, okay. Retirement was fine. For two years. I traveled. I read books. It was fun.

Fifty years ago I promised myself that I would retire on the day that I would be required to write a song about trans-vaginal ultrasounds.  I decided to unretire when I heard that member of Congress had been cavorting in the Sea of Galilee. How can you make that up?

So, I'm back to work. Shortly a schedule of public shows will be listed. Also a list of PBS Stations that we know will be carrying a 30-year retrospective of my work, entitled "Mark Russell's America" during October and/or November. As they say, you should check your local listings or call your local station for the date and time.

We'll continue to update the website.  We're still trying to figure out getting songs up. But we're working on it.
Thanks for asking about me and thanks for all the kind messages about my retirement. You will all get a personal response. It just might take a bit longer than I would like.

Oh, and one more thing.  Don't forget to vote -- if only to keep political humor alive!

A Note from Mark:

In 2010 I decided to stop performing.    I had a show upcoming in July of that year, in one of my favorite venues, the Amphitheatre at Chautauqua Institution, and thought it would be a fine place to end 60 years of nearly non-stop performing and traveling.    

It turned out to be a perfect night.   My children and grandchildren who are scattered across the United States were in attendance, some of the grandchildren seeing me for the first time.    They may still not understand what I did, but at least they saw me do it.   A number of close friends, who were in the know that this would be my final show, also made the trek north from Washington, DC to Chautauqua, NY to join in this final evening.Read More

Latest Jokes

In the indictment of the dirty dozen Russian hackers, no Americans are mentioned. Can Mueller not spell Papadopolous? Kushner?

The massive anti-Trump demonstrations in London resulted in arrests. Demonstrators were charged with impersonating Americans.

First, Trump criticized Prime Minister Theresa May. Then he praised her and then he criticized her. I understand that he regretted not having time to say hello to his good friend, Winston Churchill.

The Trump-Putin Summit: Trump thanks Putin for the election and Putin says, "what election?"

They go outside for the ceremonial shooting of reporters. Trump applauds.
Brett Kavanaugh for the Supreme Court? Antonin Scalia is gloating in his grave.

Kavanaugh would be the fifth Catholic justice. The non-Catholics ae Ginsberg, Kagen, Breyer, Roe and Wade.

Republicans, of course, are delighted with Trump's choice. When you are famous they let you do it.

Let you do what? Grab Lady Justice's pussy.
In Supreme Court decisions, Anthony Kennedy sometimes was one of the five and sometimes he was one of the four. He had a mood swing installed in his back yard.

Kennedy's record includes support of marriage equality and LGBT rights as well as gun rights and Trump's travel ban. Kennedy's bodyguard is a fully armed Gay Muslim.

Trump wants a new Justice before the November election and before Maxine Waters discovers where the Justice has dinner.

Prediction: Roe v Wade will not be overturned. Most of the 1972 Catholics are now Episcopalians.
Kudos to the president for ending the separation of families at the border. Henceforth, each family will share the same cage.

Only last week the president said that his hands were tied -- like when Stormy tied him to the bedpost.

Trump's executive order doesn't apply to the 2300 children whose officially designated location is GKW -- God Knows Where.

Trump's humanitarian gesture is motivating Congressional Republicans to pass an immigration bill -- just as soon as they finish investigating Hillary's emails.
Stabbed in the back! By our newest enemy, al qaeda Canada.

The most dangerous thing about those Canadians is that they look just like us, eh?

What other president could travel to Singapore, meet with the North Koreans, declare war on Canada and insult the entire Western World while reading "Diplomacy for Dummies" at the same time?

Bring on a Nobel Prize for Lunacy.
The Supreme Court ruled in favor of religious freedom for Christian bakers. Now, what about Christian butchers? (Slicing is speech).

Can a Christian butcher be forced to make sausages for a gay Polish wedding reception?

Can a Christian shoemaker be forced to save a gay person's sole?

Ain't religious freedom weird? "Don't take away our bigotry."
Game on in Singapore. Little Rocket Man vs Big Rocket Moron.

Or is it rope-a-dope between two dopes?

If North Korea gives us their nukes, we will lift the sanctions. Otherwise, they will have to deal with John Bolton, our Secretary of Armageddon.

Bolton is already in Singapore where customs officials searched his mustache for weapons. 
Separating families at the border. My God, we have reinvented day care.

And the parents don't even get a claim check.

If Trump became transgendered, her name would be Roseanne.

In cancelling "Roseanne" ABC went too far. They still love her in the Red States where Alabama wants to giver her her own plantation.
Along comes Oliver North and other sages to reveal the cause of school shooting number 244 or whatever: Ritalin, abortion, school design and I suppose frogs, boils and Hawaiian volcanoes.

What did Col North use to shoot the Viet Cong? Loaded crackpot opinions?

Flags were at half staff nationwide to mourn the death of the children and of sanity.

At this rate we might as well leave the flags at half staff permanently.
Michael Cohen is living the American dream -- to become a lawyer and the owner of a cab company, a money laundry and The Swamp.

Cohen formed a shadow company called Essential Consultants to which AT&T paid $50K per month. Did Ma Bell get her money's worth? The shadow knows.

Essential Consultants was originally set up for the purpose of delivering hush money to porn star Stormy Daniels -- an election year essential, hence the name.

Poor old Ma Bell was exasperated saying, "if I knew that my money was going to that hussy, i never would have voted for Donald Trump."