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  • Mark Russell
  • and Jay Leno
  • Art Buchwald, Chevy Chase and President Ford
  • Vivre la France
  • and Mort Sahl
  • and Woody Allen
  • Mark Russell
  • and Jay Leno
  • Art Buchwald, Chevy Chase and President Ford
  • Vivre la France
  • and Mort Sahl
  • and Woody Allen

A Few More Notes from Mark Russell

So, okay. Retirement was fine. For two years. I traveled. I read books. It was fun.

Fifty years ago I promised myself that I would retire on the day that I would be required to write a song about trans-vaginal ultrasounds.  I decided to unretire when I heard that member of Congress had been cavorting in the Sea of Galilee. How can you make that up?

So, I'm back to work. Shortly a schedule of public shows will be listed. Also a list of PBS Stations that we know will be carrying a 30-year retrospective of my work, entitled "Mark Russell's America" during October and/or November. As they say, you should check your local listings or call your local station for the date and time.

We'll continue to update the website.  We're still trying to figure out getting songs up. But we're working on it.
Thanks for asking about me and thanks for all the kind messages about my retirement. You will all get a personal response. It just might take a bit longer than I would like.

Oh, and one more thing.  Don't forget to vote -- if only to keep political humor alive!

A Note from Mark:

In 2010 I decided to stop performing.    I had a show upcoming in July of that year, in one of my favorite venues, the Amphitheatre at Chautauqua Institution, and thought it would be a fine place to end 60 years of nearly non-stop performing and traveling.    

It turned out to be a perfect night.   My children and grandchildren who are scattered across the United States were in attendance, some of the grandchildren seeing me for the first time.    They may still not understand what I did, but at least they saw me do it.   A number of close friends, who were in the know that this would be my final show, also made the trek north from Washington, DC to Chautauqua, NY to join in this final evening.Read More

Latest Jokes

Kudos to the president for ending the separation of families at the border. Henceforth, each family will share the same cage.

Only last week the president said that his hands were tied -- like when Stormy tied him to the bedpost.

Trump's executive order doesn't apply to the 2300 children whose officially designated location is GKW -- God Knows Where.

Trump's humanitarian gesture is motivating Congressional Republicans to pass an immigration bill -- just as soon as they finish investigating Hillary's emails.
Stabbed in the back! By our newest enemy, al qaeda Canada.

The most dangerous thing about those Canadians is that they look just like us, eh?

What other president could travel to Singapore, meet with the North Koreans, declare war on Canada and insult the entire Western World while reading "Diplomacy for Dummies" at the same time?

Bring on a Nobel Prize for Lunacy.
The Supreme Court ruled in favor of religious freedom for Christian bakers. Now, what about Christian butchers? (Slicing is speech).

Can a Christian butcher be forced to make sausages for a gay Polish wedding reception?

Can a Christian shoemaker be forced to save a gay person's sole?

Ain't religious freedom weird? "Don't take away our bigotry."
Game on in Singapore. Little Rocket Man vs Big Rocket Moron.

Or is it rope-a-dope between two dopes?

If North Korea gives us their nukes, we will lift the sanctions. Otherwise, they will have to deal with John Bolton, our Secretary of Armageddon.

Bolton is already in Singapore where customs officials searched his mustache for weapons. 
Separating families at the border. My God, we have reinvented day care.

And the parents don't even get a claim check.

If Trump became transgendered, her name would be Roseanne.

In cancelling "Roseanne" ABC went too far. They still love her in the Red States where Alabama wants to giver her her own plantation.
Along comes Oliver North and other sages to reveal the cause of school shooting number 244 or whatever: Ritalin, abortion, school design and I suppose frogs, boils and Hawaiian volcanoes.

What did Col North use to shoot the Viet Cong? Loaded crackpot opinions?

Flags were at half staff nationwide to mourn the death of the children and of sanity.

At this rate we might as well leave the flags at half staff permanently.
Michael Cohen is living the American dream -- to become a lawyer and the owner of a cab company, a money laundry and The Swamp.

Cohen formed a shadow company called Essential Consultants to which AT&T paid $50K per month. Did Ma Bell get her money's worth? The shadow knows.

Essential Consultants was originally set up for the purpose of delivering hush money to porn star Stormy Daniels -- an election year essential, hence the name.

Poor old Ma Bell was exasperated saying, "if I knew that my money was going to that hussy, i never would have voted for Donald Trump."
I see where the State Department wants to regain its old "swagger". Swagger seminars will include teaching department officials how to walk like John Wayne.

The EPA has the swagger thing down pat. When Scott Pruitt accepts swag from lobbyists, he positively struts.

If Trump gets the Nobel Prize, he will swagger and thumb his nose at the same time.

To be honest, this administration needs more swagger like the Klan needs more Republicans.
John Kelly calls Trump an idiot. Truth serum in the water supply?

Comedian Michelle Wolf didn't go "too far". She went too long. By the next morning, some of the audience was still in a state of cringe.

Next year, the Correspondence dinner will play it safe. They have already booked a Mister Rogers impersonator.

No guns will be permitted at Mike Pence's Friday address at the NRA convention. White-haired lives matter.
Now that Raul Castro has stepped down in Cuba -- we must remember his late brother, Fidel, who owed his life to the US. Every time the CIA tried to assassinate him they screwed up.

Speaking of dictators, Trump's new chief attorney, Rudy Giuliani, reaches the pinnacle of his career -- supreme, overseer of the lawyers, the lawyers' lawyers and the lawyers' lawyers' lawyer.

Like a general, Rudy should be given a uniform with decorations including the Porn Star Payoff Medal and the Presidential Fixers Citation.

Since Jeff Sessions threatens to quit if Rod Rosenstein is fired, Washington is  hunkering down for the coming massacre, Saturday night or otherwise.  Fully prepared, the media has already stockpiled the Pulitzer prizes.